5 reasons to LET IT GO before the New Year

Happy Sunday Moms! I am happy to see you all came back for more!

Well, let’s not waste any time with introductions, let’s get straight into it…..

In 2022 we are letting go! We are letting go of NEGATIVE ENERGY, ANGER, AND GRUDGES.

This is about YOU and how YOU can handle fake people with CARE. Yup, I said fake and care in the same sentence. Emphasis on handling people who fake care with care!

Moms, I am going to be real candid with you. Last week’s post was only a fragment of what I had originally typed. Friendship PTSD is traumatizing. I wanted to share my experience with a specific person and allow the readers to make me feel vindicated in my anger. I was heated and ready to let this person feel the pain they had caused me, and then reality set in…. what would I gain from that post? Closure, sure… but, at what cost?

No shade, but all shade at the same time…. the types of people I’ve dealt with are surrounded by nothing but negative energy, dishonesty, and fake love. Why would I feel the need to immerse myself into their negative bubble? Why would I want to kick someone when they are down? By down I do not mean that they are not accomplishing great things, or do not have great things to look forward to. I mean they cannot possibly be up when they know they cannot trust ANYONE in their lives. The people they love and trust the most continuously betray them. That is DOWN!!!!! I’ve been there and it is not a fun place to be. So, I want to redirect my energy into spreading love, light, and positivity.

Now don’t get it messed up I am not fooling with these people LOL. I am just simply choosing to pay them dust and wish them well at the same damn time. As I always do, even when it is not reciprocated.

But, how did I get here though? How did I switch from anger and hurt to forgiveness, healing, and moving on? I have 5 good reasons and I am ready to share them with you.

1. Relationships do not have to end on a bad note
2. Not caring about what others think
3. Misery loves company
4. Forgiveness
5. Karma

Relationships do not have to end on a bad note

I’ll start with one of the main reasons why I chose to hold back on doing people how they do me. The ending of a relationship does not have to be messy and drama filled. It should not be messy and drama filled because you once LOVED (emphasis on past tense) these people. A dear friend of mine said “you do not have to speak badly about them because you once shared many great memories with them.” At the time, I was not ready to receive that message because the anger was still fresh. But, it is true. As much as I hated to admit it, I had to be real with myself and say I used to like these people and we had some great times. Acknowledging that does not take away from the issues that destroyed the relationship. It just gives you a reason to handle the separation with delicacy. This reason is especially important for those of us who knows damn well we might end up back in that toxic friendship. Save yourself the awkward reunion by just bowing out gracefully because once you say something, you CANNOT take it back!

Not caring about what other people think

I used to care about what people thought about me A LOT! So much so, that I would tone down who I was to appease everyone. Then I realized no matter how like-able you make yourself out to be, there will always be people who do not like you. But, why do we feel the need to please people who do not like us? Why do we care what they say about us? Why do they have the power to alter our entire being? I mean when you put it this way, I think anyone would start to think damn I give these people way too much power. These same people that will smile in your face and drag your name through the mud behind your back. The same people that will sing you high praises to your face but to others you are terrible. It takes real skills to be two faced. A skill so many people we have come across in life have mastered. But what they shouldn’t master is the ability to shift your energy to their negative energy with their WORDS.

Misery loves company

LET THAT HURT GO! You ever heard of the saying misery loves company?

I mean at some point you start to become the people you dislike. You cringe at how you’ve handled certain situations. You stooped to a level that puts you both at eye level. A level you and someone two faced should never share. Because over here, that is not who we are. Put yourself in the person who either dislikes you and/ or hurt you shoes. What emotion and reaction do they want from you? I can guess right now that it is not one that involves ignoring them. I can guess that they expect you to become angry and act out of character. We usually do not get bothered by strangers but more so people we were once close to. They know what buttons to push to get a reaction out of you. That is their goal. Do not give them that satisfaction. I do not know about you but one thing I do not like is letting people who hurt me have the satisfaction of knowing they’ve done so. I’d rather eat a rock. Let them eat the rock lol.

Forgiveness

FORGIVENESS, FOR YOU….. NOT THEM! Choosing to be nice when you can be mean is not easy. The great Linnethia Leakes once said “you never win when you play dirty” and that is a saying I try to live by. Key word, TRY! The last thing I will do with my voice is not be transparent. I used to roll my eyes when people would use this cliché saying until I realized it was true. You need to forgive the situation at least, for yourself. You need to forgive so you can forget and move on with your life. Moving on means leaving everything you have shared in the past where it belongs…. In the past. This is when the true healing begins.

Karma

KARMA… I could have easily released that post I intended to post and gained a lot of attention because I truly went IN. It was entertaining. But once the entertainment dies down and I sit back and reflect on my actions I am not sure that I would be happy. Drama is like a high. When you are in the moment it is entertaining. People are egging you on. The people that heard the other side of the story (the embellished side) are now able to see the full picture and hopefully call their friend out on their crap. Then I remembered those same people entertained by the lies aren’t your people. In fact, a lot of them know the stories told were lies. So, they deserve the same energy that they entertained. I am sure they’re already receiving it lol. Imagine listening to someone bash every single person they’re close to, even their blood relatives. You don’t think they’re doing the same to you? That is their Karma. 

BONUS! 2021 was rough

In addition to the reasons above it is 2021. What I mean by that is… this year is yet another year of COVID-19 shutting down many interactions, traditions, and functions we enjoy. The last thing you should want to do is rob someone of their joy, especially after a beautiful holiday like Christmas. The holiday times are supposed to be filled with happiness and laughter with the people we love most. I am sure we all had a rough year. 2021 kicked our behinds. So, that joy we can feel and spread during this holiday season is needed. Everyone deserves that.

So, I say all of this to say, I hope we all let that hurt go this year. Take this positive outlook on not having the last nasty word and bring it into the New Year. 2021 is the LAST time we will address anything remotely similar to us acting out of character. We will not address anything that could potentially push us further from healing. We are spreading love during the end of this year and walking into 2022 with love for the people who loved and honored us through 2021. HAPPY NEW YEAR! Remember to be safe and NOT TO DRINK AND DRIVE!

Update: We are kicking up blog posts a notch in 2022. There will be 2 blog posts a week. I will still be posting every Sunday at 7pm. In addition to that, I will be adding a new category/ topic that I hope will benefit all of you! I cannot wait to share this new content with you!!! See you soon